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Bouncing with Style, By Sandra Beck, Military Mom Talk Radio

I talk a lot about Bouncing. I like the word “Bounce” because it says to me that we just get knocked down and bounce right up again like a rubber ball. “Bounce” also sounds fun. I mean really how much fun are the words “recovery”, “adjustment” and “rebound.”

Chances are if you are alive reading this you will go through death, financial loss, separation and probably divorce in this lifetime at some point or another.  I got hit with all of those in the past few years all at once and it seemed like it would never end. My life was like a wave of pain that kept washing over me – only it didn’t cleanse me it just hurt.
Life is full of hurts and I think the military family goes through more than most civilian families. They have to say goodbye a lot more. They have to change a lot more. They also wonder if mom or dad is ever coming home and if they are what will that be like. These are some of the special conditions that our military families face on a daily basis. One of my radio show guests moved 19 times in “her” military career as did “her children.”  Yeah, it was the “dad” who served but one when enlists the whole family comes along for the ride.  I call the kids the “littlest soldiers” because they are serving too.

Because life is hard and bad things happen to all of us, I have learned that the way I phrase it in my head makes a big difference in my day.  If I get up and “bounce” I smile. If I am in “recovery” I frown.  Same things happened to me, but the way I choose to phrase them in my head make all the difference.

Take my divorce. It sucked. I was cheated on, then left alone with little kids and got the bills dumped on my head while my mom died of breast cancer. Any way you slice it – it sucked.  I could use the word “divorced” but that has such an icky feel to it. I choose the word “recycled” and I feel like I am helping the planet at the same time.

I don’t like to say I am in “abuse recovery” either.  That just sounds dismal. So I choose the phrase “I’m bouncing with style.”  And what does style mean??? – it means getting up every day , fixing my hair…putting on something other than sweats and greeting my future.  Do I hit the mark every day – not a chance.  But I try and do my best to phrase things in my head in a way that serves me.  Why do it any other way?  When life bowls me over, I bounce.  Do you?

Sandra Beck is the host of Military Mom Talk Radio a show dedicated to bringing issues, solutions and up to date information to our Military Families.  Mondays 2pm PST on Toginet.com. Also available for free on Itunes.  Sandra Beck is a writer for MilitaryConnection and a member of VAMBOA and Military Writer’s Society of America This Article appeared on http://www.militaryconnection.com.

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Motherhood Talk Radio hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly and Rick Swanson presents Danee Kiernan Bouncing with Style: Starting over but Not From Scratch July 12

Motherhood Talk Radio hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly, and Rick Swanson welcomes Danee Kiernan Bouncing with Style: Starting over but Not From Scratch.

Motherhood Talk Radio, Motherhood Incorporated, Sandra Beck, Rick Swanson, Christy Holly, Mom Talk Radio, Mommy Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Moms, Embracing Motherhood, Motherhood Radio, Parenting Talk Radio, Parent Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Parents, Embracing Parenthood, Parent Radio, Mom Radio, Mommy Radio, Woman Talk Radio, Women Talk Radio, Women’s Issues Talk Radio, Women’s Health Talk Radio, Work At Home Mom Talk Radio, Women Power Talk Radio, Smart Women Talk Radio, Stupid Diet Guy Talk Radio, Stupid Diet Guy, Los Angeles Talk Radio, California Talk Radio, Dating Advice Talk Radio, Marriage Advice Talk Radio, Divorce Advice Talk Radio, Wedding Advice Talk Radio, Relationship Advice Talk Radio, Free advice on dating, free advice on marriage, free advice on divorce, free advice on weddings, free advice on relationships, free relationship advice, women’s issues shows, women’s issue show, talk radio los angeles, free cooking advice, cooking talk radio, family matters, advice for families, free advice for families, free adoption advice, advocate for women, crafting for moms, mommy crafts, beading, care packages for soldiers, child adoption services, empowerment thinking, optimal thinking, culture building, diversity training, eldercare talk radio, nutrition talk radio, fit to strip challenge, friend ship talk radio, girlfriend talk radio, girlfriend advice on dating, girlfriend advice on marriage, girlfriend advice on wedding, girlfriend advice on relationship, stupid diet guy on dating, stupid diet guy on marriage, stupid diet guy on divorce, stupid diet guy on weddings, stupid diet guy on relationships, pet health care, pet health insurance, Zestra, SempraeAs an author, speaker, parent and entrepreneur, Danee Kiernan enjoys her busy life as much as she enjoys sharing stories of the heart with others.  Whether she is writing, conversing one on one, or presenting to a large group, Danee shares her belief that destiny is a matter of choice, not chance. Her strategies for emotional survival, personal empowerment and engagement in life, stem from not only her own experiences, but also the life journeys shared by others along the way.

 

Danee Kiernan is the co-author of Bouncing with Style.  In this project, Danee Kiernan and Sandra Beck partner to share their discovery of stepping stones and successful strategies from women who have experienced hardship and traveled the road to recovery with conviction and confidence.  The result is a culmination of real life recommendations designed to help others navigate life’s challenges with grace and style.  

 

Danee Kiernan is the owner of Aris Partners, Inc., an executive recruiting firm and Tablefor14, an adoption advocacy group.  As an advocate for the rights of women and children, Danee Kiernan supports Heifer International, Children Uniting Nations, World of Children, FRUA (Families for Russian and Ukrainian Adoption), LAAF (Latin American Adoptive Families), Voices United as well as other organizations committed to the well being of women and children. 

 

Danee Kiernan makes her home in Wisconsin, where she and husband Jim, are thoroughly enjoying the experience of raising their 12 children.  She earned a Bachelor’s degree in Elementary Education from Iowa Wesleyan College and MBA from the University of Wisconsin.

 

You can reach Danee Kiernan at daneekiernan@gmail.com

 

Motherhood Talk Radio is co-hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly and Rick Swanson, hosted by Toginet Radio and powered by Motherhood Incorporated.  Motherhood Talk Radio would like to thank our guest who have spoken with respect to motherhood on the following topics: women’s issues, parenting, relationship advice, personal growth, divorce, marriage, dating, weddings, relationships, health care, pet health, crafting, beading, relationship advice, cooking, family matters, care packages for soldiers, nutrition, child adoption, children with brain injuries, children’s advocacy, autism, cancer, eldercare issues, child care issues, personal growth and parenting issues.

Motherhood Talk Radio hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly and Rick Swanson present Linda Franklin of the Real Cougar Woman

Motherhood Talk Radio, Motherhood Incorporated, Sandra Beck, Rick Swanson, Christy Holly, Mom Talk Radio, Mommy Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Moms, Embracing Motherhood, Motherhood Radio, Parenting Talk Radio, Parent Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Parents, Embracing Parenthood, Parent Radio, Mom Radio, Mommy Radio, Woman Talk Radio, Women Talk Radio, Women’s Issues Talk Radio, Women’s Health Talk Radio, Work At Home Mom Talk Radio, Women Power Talk Radio, Smart Women Talk Radio, Stupid Diet Guy Talk Radio, Stupid Diet Guy, Los Angeles Talk Radio, California Talk Radio, Dating Advice Talk Radio, Marriage Advice Talk Radio, Divorce Advice Talk Radio, Wedding Advice Talk Radio, Relationship Advice Talk Radio, Free advice on dating, free advice on marriage, free advice on divorce, free advice on weddings, free advice on relationships, free relationship advice, women’s issues shows, women’s issue show, talk radio los angeles, free cooking advice, cooking talk radio, family matters, advice for families, free advice for families, free adoption advice, advocate for women, crafting for moms, mommy crafts, beading, care packages for soldiers, child adoption services, empowerment thinking, optimal thinking, culture building, diversity training, eldercare talk radio, nutrition talk radio, fit to strip challenge, friend ship talk radio, girlfriend talk radio, girlfriend advice on dating, girlfriend advice on marriage, girlfriend advice on wedding, girlfriend advice on relationship, stupid diet guy on dating, stupid diet guy on marriage, stupid diet guy on divorce, stupid diet guy on weddings, stupid diet guy on relationships, pet health care, pet health insurance. The Real Cougar Woman is a 5-carat diamond with each of the 5-carats representing an essential facet of her life.   The 5-carats are:  health, beauty, relationships, finance and spirituality. Achieving clarity in all 5 carats insures she will shine just like a perfect-cut diamond.

The Real Cougar woman realizes that she, and she alone, is responsible for everything in her life.   Just like an artist, she sits in front of a blank canvas every day and creates her reality. 

Being a 5-carat diamond allows her to be:

  • A woman who isn’t afraid to knock down walls and crash through glass ceilings.
  • A woman who adores men but refuses to be defined by the age of the man she chooses to be with.
  • A woman who goes inside herself for the answers.
  • A woman who knows how to keep her body healthy, her beauty radiant and her spiritual reservoir full.
  • A woman who puts financial freedom high on her priority list.

Linda retells her story, “Every woman, whether she realizes it or not, has a Real Cougar just waiting to be unleashed. Living your life as a smart, sexy, independent woman is the best gift you can give yourself. So get over listening to what other people think you should do and start living the life you deserve.  This is the time to let go of your preconceived notions about aging, about sexuality, about beauty, about relationships with money, and give yourself permission to explore all of your possibilities. 

I know many women think that a cougar is a derogatory word used to describe women who  prefer younger men.  Nothing could be further from the truth. A Real Cougar, a term I coined in 2007, is any woman over 40 who is turned on and excited about life. 

The Real Cougar Woman is a fabulous female who is reconstructing the role of women today and will continue to do so for many years to come.

Achieving the rank of Real Cougar is a privilege, never an embarrassment.  You have worked hard to earn your stripes, so be proud to revel in your accomplishments.  For far too long, women over 40 have been pushed to the sidelines. You are mothers, business executives, entrepreneurs and teachers. You are a million things, but not the complete woman you have always wanted to be.  Now is the time to change all that.

Now is the time to realize your brilliance.  If not now – when?

I was born inToronto,Canada and moved toNew York Cityin my early twenties.  Never having finished college, I worked as a secretary because that’s all I thought I was qualified to do.  

Wall Street in the late 70’s was not a woman friendly environment but I used that to my advantage.  At age 28 I walked into my boss’s office and asked to work in the firm’s trading department.  He said yes, but it came with a very big caveat.  He said, “make it or be fired”.  That challenge made me determined to succeed and I did.  I was the first Canadian woman to own a seat on The New York Stock Exchange and then went on to manage this leading investment firm’s all male trading department.

Then at 48 my life changed drastically.  Due to a number of circumstances I decided to leave Wall Street.  That transition was a devastating blow to my psyche.  I didn’t realize how much of my identity I had attached to my work.  Retirement had never been a thought in my mind and I  had no idea of how to cope with not having a good reason to get up in the morning.  

When I could no longer stand wallowing in self pity, I made the conscious decision to take back my power and my life. Over the next two years, I went on a quest to find the answers that would help me with my relationships, maintaining a healthy body, looking fabulous, starting a new career and filling my spiritual reservoir.   That journey, as tough as it was, turned out to be a blessing.  It re-ignited my passion and allowed me to get excited about act two of my life.

Wanting to share what I had learned I started a blog.  People ask me all the time why I decided to call it the The Real Cougar Woman. 

It wasn’t planned – it just happened after I started to read a slew of unflattering articles about women over 40.  They were being called “cougars”, and portrayed as predators on the prowl for young men. This negative spin upset me and  I wanted to focus on the many virtues of real women not the media’s idea of women over 40.  So I coined the term Real Cougar as  my way of celebrating our age, our accomplishments, our independence, and our passion for life.  I make it clear that a Real Cougar refuses to be defined by the age of the man she chooses to be with.  Today, three years later I am still doing everything I can to make “cougar” a designer label that women all over the world are proud to wear.

My best selling book Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am! – The Real Cougar Guidebook for Life After 40 is helping me to expand my message.  It has important information that every woman needs to read.  I have also included inspiring stories from other fabulous females that truly warmed my heart.  It let me know we are all together on this journey through time.

My newest initiative is “The Combat Cougars”. This is my outreach to support women in the military.  Like most worthwhile ventures it wasn’t planned.  After receiving emails from military women ‘combat cougars’ who felt empowered after reading my blog – the path seemed obvious.” 

Motherhood Talk Radio is co-hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly and Rick Swanson, hosted by Toginet Radio and powered by Motherhood Incorporated.  Motherhood Talk Radio would like to thank our guest who have spoken with respect to motherhood on the following topics: women’s issues, parenting, relationship advice, personal growth, divorce, marriage, dating, weddings, relationships, health care, pet health, crafting, beading, relationship advice, cooking, family matters, care packages for soldiers, nutrition, child adoption, children with brain injuries, children’s advocacy, autism, cancer, eldercare issues, child care issues, personal growth and parenting issues.

Motherhood Talk Radio powered by Motherhood Incorporated and Hosted by Sandra Beck welcomes Alisa Bowman author of Project: Happily Ever After January 25th

Sandra Beck, Motherhood Talk Radio, Mom Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Mothers, Mommy Talk,  Christy Holly, Rick Swanson, Itunes, Motherhood Incorporated, Toginet, Itunes, Alisa Bowman, Project: Happily Ever AfterIn Project: Happily Ever After, Alisa Bowman bravely tells the story of how she went from wishing her husband dead to renewing her wedding vows.  Her four-month project was a last ditch effort to save a marriage that many – her friends, her colleagues and ever her own mother – had written off as hopeless.   Alisa will be discussing her book and share the insight, inspiration and information only any author can bring to her work.Sandra Beck, Motherhood Talk Radio, Mom Talk Radio, Talk Radio for Mothers, Mommy Talk,  Christy Holly, Rick Swanson, Itunes, Motherhood Incorporated, Toginet, Itunes, Alisa Bowman, Project: Happily Ever After

Tune into Alison Bowman on Motherhood Talk Radio on January 25, 2011 at 3pm pst or download this shows from www.itunes.com and www.motherhoodtalkradio.com.

Motherhood Talk Radio is powered by http://www.MotherhoodIncorporated.com, bringing you the most powerful voice in women’s issues today and is hosted by Sandra Beck, Christy Holly and Rick Swanson.  Motherhood Talk Radio airs on www.Toginet.com every Tuesday, 3 pm pacific, 4pm mountain, 5 pm central and 6 pm eastern and can be downloaded from  www.Itunes.com and www.motherhoodtalkradio.com.

Motherhood Talk Radio Presents Lisa Kamen, Harvesting Happiness – Aug. 31

Lisa Kamen, Lisa Cypers Kamen, Harvesting Happiness, H-Factor, H-Factor Where is Your Heart?, Motherhood Talk Radio, Sandra BeckIndependent filmmaker Lisa Kamen produced the 10-minute short, “A Passage Through India—Diamonds in the Rough,” for her bachelor’s degree and used it successfully to raise funds for the Sulaxmi School for Girls in Lucknow, India, which her family now supports. While biking through Northern India, Kamen was struck by how, even in the presence of extreme poverty, the Indian people could express joy and genuine happiness. This is the genesis for Lisa’s master’s thesis in Spiritual Psychology—a documentary film she is co-creating with her nine year-old daughter, Kayla, who operates the camera. Together they explore the hypothesis that every person, regardless of socioeconomic level, age, ethnicity, career, health, or life circumstances, possesses happiness or the means to feel happy. Their endeavor to discover possibly universal keys to human happiness leads the duo on an entertaining, deeply touching documentary adventure.

Using the spontaneity of man-on-the-street style interviewing, Lisa and Kayla ask prospective interviewees to contribute their heartprint to a G-rated documentary film exploring the nature of happiness. Mother and daughter have logged hundreds of interviews to date, filming all kinds of people, each for about 60 seconds, responding to one question that elicits the essence of happiness and joy for that individual. These one-minute heartprint interviews have been filmed in diverse locales around India and in the United States including Central Park, Ground Zero, bus stations, homeless shelters, fire and police stations, schools for the deaf, independent living centers, jail, hospitals, houses of worship, a funeral home, people in commuter traffic, in lines, in labor, in escrow, and in debt—and the filming continues…

The film’s point of view is through the eyes of nine year-old Kayla. Her unique perspective—literally about four feet from the ground—means a low camera angle combines with high energy and humor. Her presence, suited up with professional camera equipment and headset, monitoring her sound levels and video, seems to soften interviewees, making their revelations especially genuine. A second camera operator captures the interchange between interviewee, Kayla, and Lisa, accentuating the multiplier effect of happiness on others.  Experts and lay people alike see ample evidence that wealth, fame, and material goods don’t produce real happiness. In “H-Factor…Where is Your Heart?” real people from all walks of life illustrate—in humorous and heartfelt ways—what does.

Motherhood Talk Radio is powered by Motherhood Incorporated, bringing you the most powerful voice in women’s issues today. Motherhood Talk Radio airs on Toginet.com every Tuesday, 3 pm pst, 5 pm central and 6 pm eastern.