Here I am again, my only company our puppy Lola, working away while the rest of my family sleeps. I actually don’t mind it – I get some time alone, uninterrupted, to reflect and knock out some of the things I’ve been thinking about all day.
By the time I get to this point, I’ve usually got my work formulated in my head so that it doesn’t take too long, my only problem is finding a place to stop. I’ll look up and see that it’s 1 a.m. and I forgot to put the laundry in the dryer. Not to mention, my poor husband whom I really am attracted too, but who has realized by now that any “action” will probably only involve counting sheep.
Which leads me to my biggest dilemma when working from home – navigating my roles.
There’s the realtor/writer/journalist side of me which has to turn on a dime for a client’s call, punch through a story without getting distracted and losing my train of thought, or try to seem cool for an exclusive party or the latest club where I have to take photos, and then come home and upload in between dishes and diapers.
Amidst all that, there’s the mom role which is so important, but oftentimes squeezed in – like dusting or playing Barbies with my daughter after the 6th time she’s asked.
I also try to spend at least one night a week with my girlfriends, even if it’s just them coming over for dinner. But really, most of them are single and the way I spend my days is hardly high quality dinner conversation.
And then the most elusive role of all – sex goddess. I love my husband, I want him, I want him to want me, and I really hate that my life is in any way cliché, but half the time I’m so tired and the other half, I don’t want him to discover that it’s been 4 days since I last shaved. I’d rather it be quality over quantity, while I’m sure you can guess what his response is!
Unfortunately, it is this role that gets pushed to the side more often than not – it’s one thing to be cliché, another to be a statistic. He’s so supportive and understanding, I worry that perhaps I’ll unknowingly take advantage of that, which of course will only end badly.
So, I realize that my work always gets done, although sometimes later rather than sooner, my kids are stuck with me no matter what, as are my friends, but I hate that the one person who chooses to be with me, is the one that gets the frazzled remains. With our 5-year anniversary coming up, I’m going to try really hard to put him first more, at least once the clock chimes 10 p.m. Oops… I’m late! ♥